College: half-ass your way to graduation.

I’m not endorsing the above statement.

I don’t have to. It’s a daily habit of students already.

I hate turning in garbage. If I haven’t done what I’m supposed to do, I don’t try to turn in some crap I whipped together. I’d rather take a zero.

That hasn’t worked out for me. This is my sixth year of college.

I’m in my final semester, and I’ve discovered that classmates are experts at just turning in bull.

They don’t care about learning. They care about passing.

Show up, turn in half-assed work, cram for your exams (so you can forget everything immediately after), pay tuition, and you get a diploma!

Yes, sleep through class. Yes, text through class. Yes, wear sweatpants to class. Yes, beg professors for leniency.

Examples:

  • After clear threats on the syllabus about deadlines for a course, I decided that I would take a zero on two assignments because I couldn’t get them in by email on time. What did I find out this week? That other students just email them in late without explanation and get full credit without even a comment from the professor. Too cool.
  • Another professor of mine preaches about strict deadlines, and so when I couldn’t get a story finalized on time, I unfortunately came to terms with my zero. After class, I find out that two students were granted an extension without hesitation. Great.

I haven’t even mentioned that most students admit their assignments are half-done, half made-up and mostly crammed together half-heartedly at the last minute.

Perfect.

So what the hell is the point of higher education? It seems like training for con-gaming to me.

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2 Comments

  1. In elementary school, they teach you how to write in cursive.
    “Once you get to middle school, all your teachers will make you write in cursive!”

    None of your middle school teachers make you write in cursive.
    But they give you homework. So much homework.
    “High-school level work only gets more difficult!”

    Honors English is a breeze, you took algebra as an eighth grader, and the hardest part about biology is organizing your notes in the order you professor demands (interactive notebooks, anyone?)
    But all this work is formatted in MLA style.
    “Your professor won’t even allow you to turn in work that’s not in MLA format! You can’t make it through college without your work matching every specific guideline!”

    You get to college, where as long as it’s typed and turned in somewhat on time, you can pass.
    But the expectations are higher.
    “You’re an adult! You should have the time management to excel at all five of your upper-level courses (mine, of course, being the most important), get involved without drinking or partaking in reckless behavior, and find a stable career after you graduate exactly on time!”

    …what will the Real World ask of us?

  2. hahaha so true. I loved this. I am one of those students who request leniency all the time. After awhile (like my first semester) I noticed that no one gave a damn so I just kinda stopped trying to get things in all the time. I usually rush through my homework right before class and turn in essays that hardly make any sense and yet somehow I still pass. In fact last semester I got mostly A-s and one B-. I was shocked. It felt like all the work I had done my first semester was for nothing since doing even less still got me good grades. I told my parents that I thought college was a scam and all they wanted was your money and as long as you weren’t a complete douche to the teachers you’d most likely pass. I felt that there weren’t any standards anymore, at least not the way I expected them to be. My mom basically said “Well sweetie, you find it really easy because you’re really smart and that’s why you get good grades.” LMAO…


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