“I want you to be a father” says Lupe Fiasco in his track “He Say She Say”

(Image courtesy of http://rap.about.com/)

I’ve focused on bad parenting already, but there are many ways parents fail their children.

So far, I’ve mentioned parental failures in the yuppy/too busy/nonchalant category. These types of failures are the result of parents not understanding or dedicating the time and work it takes to discipline and teach children to be good people.

On another hand, some people are simply unprepared and ill equipped to take on the role of “parent.” Lupe Fiasco‘s track “He Say She Say” highlights this aspect and expresses, from the perspective of mother and son, the hardships of a young man growing up without a father figure.

Too busy to give your kids money? ThreeJars is the solution.

(Image courtesy of ThreeJars.com)

You rarely see your kids because you’re too busy working, socializing, etc. to be a parent. So what’s the best way to fill that void?

Why, it’s to create an online account where kids can send you text alerts when they need money, of course!

Penn, of Penn & Teller, says “You don’t want to be good because of reward or punishment”

(Image courtesy of http://www.downshoredrift.com)

Doing research for the parenting aspect of this blog, I ran across this video. And I think the really interesting part happens around 2:30 when Penn Jillette says that “…you want to be good because it’s good.” Penn is a very well known atheist and while I’m not encouraging the atheism aspect, he explains “being good” in a very unique way. I saw this video for the first and only time a few months ago, and it stuck with me. I had to go find it.

PS- Whoever decided to disable the embedding option for this video on YouTube should rethink that.

“If you don’t sit down RIGHT NOW you’re not getting dessert!”

This is another meaningless threat that parents make toward their children in a half-hearted attempt at parenting. Parents have a great deal of responsibility! Do we need more unruly babies that grow up to drive drunk, start fights, torture kittens, assault strangers on college campuses, treat people poorly and become burdens to our culture and planet? No.

You’ve seen bad parenting in public: that child being dragged away from the snack isle after throwing a public tantrum about Scooby Doo gummy snacks, those frightened looking children with a backpack-like leash on at the zoo. Bad parents are oblivious to the fact that their child negatively effects EVERYONE within the vicinity of their precious little monster. And that’s what I’d like to talk about– oblivious non-parenting.

If only the parents were lending a helping hand 16 years ago...

My recent experience as a server: It’s dinner rush on Friday and I’m waiting on a table of Mom, Dad and three urchins. We, as servers, are moving fast and I come around the corner out of the kitchen with a HUUUUGE tray piled with dishes on my shoulder, supported by both hands and my visibility is limited. I’m barreling down the aisle managing this heavy tray and out pops urchin #3 from my table into my path in the middle of the aisle. I barely dodge him to avoid pummeling him and luckily another server helped to recover my tray full of food before it tipped, crashed, and shattered. Every employee in the restaurant stopped and noticed. A minimum of twelve guests stopped to stare open-mouthed in amazement. The Mom and Dad? They glanced up from their Blackberries for a second, looked bored and continued with their mobile business without a comment.

Over the past two generations, parents have dropped the ball! And knowing right and wrong parenting shouldn’t be difficult. We all HAD parents. And they had parents. Somewhere in there is a good example. Or maybe you could ask a friend. And if that doesn’t work, you can google the words “responsible parenting.” Check out the responsible parenting initiative!

If the main biological point of having children is to leave a legacy or to further your gene pool, what’s the point of having monsters that grow up to be a detriment to society?! Have parents become too lazy? Do they have too much on their plate? Has contraception failed us? Do parents care about the quality of their offspring? The real problem now is getting bad parents to REALIZE that they’re bad parents. They’re oblivious!

It is hard for me not to constantly think about the dumbing down of the gene pool that is featured in the 2006 movie Idiocracy. While it is a humorous film, the concept scares the hell out of me! I come from a family where throwing a temper tantrum was just not an option. I didn’t know what the consequence would be, but I knew that I DID NOT WANT TO FIND OUT. But this newer generation acts completely impervious to laws, rules and consequences. Where have all the parents gone?!

Parents: You are wholly responsible for the behavior of your children! If you don’t become a responsible parent, I WILL turn this car around and Santa is not bringing you anything but coal for Christmas (or maybe Parenting for Dummies)!